Anger

Ugh.... I'm tired of grieving. I've been in one stage or another for 8 months and I'm angry again. I don't want to deal with any more grief,  going backwards. I was moving forward and now I'm back to the beginning. There is nothing I can do about any of this. I hate it. 

I'm pissed off. I'm mad that there is not more studies and research for pPROM and pregnancies after pPROM loss. I'm pissed that the drs took a wait and see with me. I'm mad that because I was pregnant with twins there was less they would do for me. I'm disappointed that I was punished for having two babies instead of one. I'm mad at my body and I hate my stupid cervix. I'm mad that I have 3 babies that I couldn't hold onto long enough to have them be born and live. I had 1 job and I failed!